Archive for category Humor

Activist Teamwork Scenario

WARNING: This is a tongue-in-cheek post. Please enjoy it in the facetious spirit in which is was intended.

After having a couple glasses of wine the other day, I was thinking about general activist and NGO strategies. Yes, sorry. Sometimes I think about business even when I’m relaxing. Here’s the thought that came to mind after two shiraz.

Often activist or NGOs act at cross-purposes. For example:

Woman holding up shopping bA general objective of anti-consumerism groups is that they want people to consume less material goods so that reduced consumption has more positive effects on the environment. Less consumption, less production, less pollution, etc. Let’s not talk about the decreased economic development and a reduction in the standard of living. That’s a theme for a more serious post. Let’s just contrast this anti-consumerism objective against another popular advocacy group, consumerists.

Consumerist groups want, among other things, for credit card companies to cease “abusive” practices in terms of eliminating excessive interest rates and hidden fees. On this one, you don’t get a substantial argument from me, but again further discussion on this issue is better saved for a more serious post.

What I want to point out here today is my shiraz inspired flash of genius. Perhaps if these two advocacy movements worked together they could reach mutually satisfactory goals. How?

Let’s say that consumerist groups left the credit card companies alone, leaving those companies to charge whatever the heck they liked, with excessive fees and hidden charges running rampant. What would happen then, if you follow basic economic theory, is that consumers would curtail their usage of credit cards. With less credit card usage, in the United States at least, there would likely be less consumption, giving the anti-consumerism folks a check mark in their victory column. QED.

But what would the consumerist folks get out of this? After all, if the consumerist folks dropped the credit card company haranguing, a major item on their overall activist agenda, then what would they do each day from 9 to 5? Would there suddenly be massive unemployment in the consumerist activist sector of the economy?

I don’t think so.

Such a strategic alliance between anti-consumerism advocates and consumerist advocates would also benefit the overall consumerist agenda. Consumerists aren’t solely about nailing credit card companies. Consumerists also seek to achieve better deals for consumers in all product and service areas. And the magic here, in this joint venture proposed, would be that consumers would get those better deals.

Now, of course those better deals wouldn’t be from the credit card companies. The consumerists are letting the credit card companies run around like lunatics just busted out of the asylum. Remember? No, those better deals for consumers would be offered from other companies where those credit cards would be used. Like retail stores.

Those better deals in stores, and other credit card accepting businesses, would be because of the decreased consumerism. Business would be flatlining. In the hope of covering costs and just breaking even, stores and other credit card accepting companies would offer out-of-this-world deals just to get customers in door.

Is this a crazy strategy?

Well, it’s success, of course, is dependent upon consumers’ propensity-to-spend, their willingness to use cash as a medium of exchange, the fluctuation of the savings rate, the cost of credit, and about a hundred other factors at play at any given moment within the macro-economy.

But it is something to think about.

Now. Someone was recently telling me that shiraz-cabernet is more mellow than shiraz alone.

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The Warm and Fuzzy Side of the Anti-Corporate Movement

ball of yarn 51When you think of the anti-corporate movement usually images of protest and boycott come to mind, with all the rancor, derision, and conflict that come with such things. Think the word “anti-corporate” and our conditioning often leads us into the realm of serious, heavy, and sometimes troubling thoughts.

Well, not today.

Today, think cute. Think warm and fuzzy, literally as well as figuratively. Think yarn.

I recently noticed an article entitled “The Anti-Corporate Gift Guide” on the blog Million Dollar Swim. “Anti-Corporate Gift Guide?” That’s a really cute and humorous approach to such a heavy concept. During the holiday season, how could I not read this one? I couldn’t. So I did.

This article uses as its theme for anti-corporatism the idea of making gifts to give or the idea of buying handmade articles. This post was written by a woman named Amelia, living in Montreal, and operating a “little yarn shop.” Amelia tells us that business was good two weekends ago and that she had many customers rushing into the shop for gift-making materials. I’m glad her shop was busy. I like to see any business do well.

She tells us that to “hold out against consumerism” she will be knitting all the gifts that she is giving this season. (Presumably using materials from her own shop.)

Moving on within this theme of anti-consumerism, Amelia then tells us that if she was to buy gifts this season rather than make them herself, she mentions and pictures about a half-dozen handmade gifts, made by other handcrafters, that she would purchase. You may go to her article here to see those pictures and read those descriptions if so inclined.

I suppose with regard to Amelia’s would-be purchase of handmade gifts in lieu of those found at any traditional store, or her preference to make gifts rather than submit to “consumerism,” and with regard to her customers who will be using her yarn as handmade “gift raw materials,” there will be some lost value-added to the economy, value-added that the Canadian government could have taxed. (Something they really like to do up there in the Great White North.) But, I don’t suppose that relatively infinitesimal amount of lost value-added will show up as any negative numbers in any economic report. Unless, of course, this trend continues. But it would seem, at least to my tastes, that such a trend isn’t likely to catch fire anytime soon.

Each to his own, as they say. I suppose some folks like this sort of product, but I’ll just say that gifts of this type aren’t my cup of tea. Perhaps others find them attractive, but I would bet that that segment of the market isn’t very large.

And if that segment is actually very small, then big business doesn’t have much to worry about from this kind of anti-corporate movement strategy. Yet, I must say that I find this approach to anti-corporatism refreshing, maybe even tongue-in-cheek, and certainly one possessing much more character than the approaches used by pugnacious demonstrators.

Anyway, I wish Amelia the best with her yarn store and hope that her friends and family enjoy their gifts.

I’ll be back here on Telofski.com after the first of the year. In the meantime . . .

Happy Holidays.

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U.S. Senate Votes Now via XML?

By the title of this post, I don’t mean that the U.S. Senate will vote by using XML.  I mean that the U.S. Senate is making it’s past votes, its voting history, available in XML format.  Read here for more information. Imagine the mashup possibilities here.  They could be hysterical.

Bloggers, on both sides of the political spectrum, will finally be able to rehash and mash up votes with other media to get those votes to turn out they way they want them.  Votes mashed up with Google maps, and podcasts, and videos, and Flickr pix.  Ones-sided votes, over-sided votes, landslides, mandates; all these things will come to pass on many different blogs, all of them different and all with the same voting records.  Sort of like The Daily Show, but on a micro basis. This could be hysterical.  It could also be confusing.

Imagine a million blogs, many of them not satire or parody sites, suddenly getting in the business of trying to be funny.  Dipping an untrained toe into the waters of parody and satire.  Mashing and hashing and rewriting “history” with their own version of Senate votes.  And combine that with the slow, but sure, demise of the central “repositories of reality,” i.e. mainstream newspapers.  Then what might we have.  More people who are more confused than they already are?

This is going to be funny, or sad.  I’ll let you know which later.

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How Does this Add Up?

In a recent article about marketers, here, it was stated that an “overwhelming majority,” or 88% of those who responded, use some form of social media in their marketing programs.

Impressive.

But then the article also states the top three questions on those marketers minds.  The third most popular question was, “Where do I start?”

Seems that if 88% of respondents are already using social media in marketing programs, they’ve already started.

Just curious.  How does this add up?

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An Interesting Conundrum

I read a lot of surveys about social media usage in business.  Recently I read another that made be chuckle.  And it probably made the survey taker chuckle as well.

In a recent survey from Social Trenz, it was discovered that the most significant barrier to social media marketing program creation is “lack of knowledgeable staff.”  Indeed, 46% of respondents felt this way.  Okay.  That’s a legitimate concern.  Yet it seems rather odd since social media is such a new tool.  What do they expect?   But that’s not the funny part.  The funny part is this.

In this survey, of marketers who do not participate actively in social media marketing when asked how knowledgeable they were about social media, two-thirds responded that they were either “very” or “somewhat” knowledgeable.  Huh?  Seems kind of odd that 46% said there was no knowledgeable staff to create a program, but 66% said that they themselves were knowledgeable.

I just love information like this.  Keeps the brain sharp while providing a smile.

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Does Anyone Really Understand Social Media Language?

Maybe it’s just me, but I wonder why social media mavens can’t communicate clearly. Ironic isn’t it? What do I mean? Take a look at this example from a recent Guru.com project description.

“I have been working on evolving today’s media to a very innovative user controlled media which includes a Social Network and its IM with exhaustive detail on user interface and a plan for integrating our own print magazines (Movie channel-on the road map for 5 years) with the online applications built for them. There is innovation in the revenue channels as well as the purpose for the core Social Network too. The idea is very innovative but it lacks a business plan that could assess the commercial viabiltiy (sic) of this idea and various other financial assesment. (sic)”

Huh? I had to read this paragraph four times to figure out what this guy meant. And I’m still not quite sure I understand him.

No wonder he’s seeking someone else to write his business plan. If he wrote it, the banker would probably laugh him all the way out of the office. And never mind the bankers, the consultants reading this request for proposal are going to have a tough time figuring out exactly what this guy’s business is. So, writing a business plan for it will be extra challenging. If this guy continues to write like this, he’s going to lack a business plan, and funding, for quite a while.

Lack of understanding? As I said above. It could be me. But I doubt it. I’ve been in this Internet business for ten years. Pretty much since the beginning. And in that time I’ve seen this sort of gobblety-gook communication get worse. Much worse.

The above example of nonsensical writing brings me to my point. In social media, it seems that most mavens are so concerned about appearing ultra-hip, that they fling buzz words and buzz phrases around so freely that all sense of meaning is lost. I’ve sat in meetings where the buzz flies fast and loose, and it’s piled higher and deeper as the meeting progresses. Social media mavens also seem to have an aversion to using proper grammar and syntax, just like in the example above. Again, it seems that they do this in order to raise their own “cool” factor. Well, it’s not cool. It’s confusing.

It’s especially confusing to potential clients who aren’t part of the social media “scene.” What these potential bill payers see is a group of “cool” men and women, all dressed in black by the way, essentially talking among themselves. Could this be part of the problem behind the slow adoption of social media by business?

Of course, I understand that language, like programming code, changes and evolves. But in each, there are still standards. And the standards are there to create a common ground for understanding. That’s what language, and the communication it creates, is all about.

So to all social meeting mavens out there, would you stop trying to one-up each other, use common language and grammar, and simply communicate clearly?

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Now Following that Twitter Gordon Brown, UK PM

Is Gordon Brown now the Twitter-in-Chief?  Sounds rather odd, no? Following that twit Gordon Brown, UK PM. Sorry it’s a new media pun.

Just got word today that Gordon Brown, the Prime Minster of Britain, has opened an account on Twitter. So I couldn’t resist the twit pun. Too much Monty Python in my youth.

This development must be direct result of the UK government’s “quick” action into social media. See my other post on this.

So does this mean that Brown is currently the coolest Brit?  Displacing Amy Winehouse?

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